To My First Love (TMFL)
J.R. Sonder's debut self-published poetry book
The Collection
To My First Love (TMFL) is a collection of ten years’ worth of choices and exploration of the impact of domestic violence on the eldest daughter navigating aspects of mental health, womanhood, love, lust, and sex from ages 17 to 29.
The Acts
TMFL is divided into three acts, with two including sub acts. The acts focus on three key players, The Universe, The Sun, and The Moon. Each act marks distinct turning points in life with new lessons (mostly) taken into account in the next act. Sometimes we have to learn the same lesson multiple times.
It was interesting and emotional to see these parts so vividly after so many years. Sort of how when you look at a photo album, except I was looking at haphazard words in diaries and script matted with tear stains.
Though terrifying, it was fantastic to release it all.
Click on the image to read the Act.
The Mosaic
I was in Aotearoa (New Zealand) when I made the mosaic for the cover of TMFL. That trip to Aotearoa was the first time in my life I ever felt truly safe and secure. The mosaic took some hours in between watching F1, day trips to Kerikeri and to Auckland, and living without the expectation and confinement of my childhood.
Mosaic arranges pieces of art materials into a whole image. TMFL is composed of three acts and is not a whole story without the others. Sprayed with glitter spray but photographed in a permanent shadow, the brightness of each act and aspect (Universe, Sun, Moon) moves with the gloss cover of the paper back mimicking the back and forth of growth.
The Responses
"Authentic and uncomfortable. The script writing is a fun new element that almost makes it a little light hearted. A visual representation of what things appear to be and then the poems on either side make you go oh. So much to interpret and think about it. Love the honouring of Arab and classical poetry."
- Eden, AUS
"Just beyond.”
- Jo, NZ
Your Copy
Thank you for reading and supporting.
Love,
J.R. Sonder
